Published on Jul 06 2009 by Team NM (compiled from 'Centenary Edition Tariq 1989')

My first task in the Jama'at started with Majils Khuddamul Ahmadiyya. As a member of Atfalul Ahmadiyya, I was so eager to become a Khadim as I did not want to be a Tifl for long. Of course, any attempts made were quite futile and were turned down, by the then Sadr Sahib, Hadhrat Mirza Nasir Ahmad (ru), in view of my age.

On becoming a Khadim, my first post was as a 'Saiq' - a leader of 10. This proved a bitter experience as I was dealing with my own brothers, most older than me and therefore looked down on me. If I relayed any decision to them on the authority of Majlis Khuddamul Ahmadiyya, they would take it lightly. In this regard, I suppose, I was more idealistic and therefore surprised how members of the Jama'at, who prescribed to the system would now obey someone; a Khadim they regarded as inferior. In those days, I was very hasty in reporting matters to my superiors, expecting them to take my side immediately. My mistake was this impatience, which led to further suffering, in that subordinates would not co-operate and superiors would not support me. I felt things just happened and no-one really cared. It was very difficult to accept, but ultimately, I learned, that in relationships which are relgious in character - coercion plays a small role - if one at all. It is important, for a person to rise to the occasion, and reach a status where people will respect you; subsequently, your command will be followed. It is through conviction and concerted hard labour after which you can win people over and get them to obey you.

There is a basic training one needs before leading a group, and this involves how to get people to obey you, as God says: "...I built the universe in the first six days and sat on the throne on the seventh..." This lesson I learnt, and realised that in religion you make your own universe and then apply your authority. Therefore, by the time I became Sadr, I had gone through various stages of holding various posts - and knew when to obey and how to be obeyed.